Kurt Braunohler raised $6,000 on Kickstarter to “hire a man in a plane to write stupid things in the sky.” I backed this project.
if you ever get Sad just throw whatever youre holding onto th ground and yell ‘FOOTBALL’ as loud as you can
what if its a baby
dont question the man he gave you clear fucking instructions
i wish there was a non-assholeish way to say “our friendship has run it’s course, you make me uncomfortable with your feelings and a lot of shit you do pisses me off bye”
why am i not a banana
Because your genetic code dictates that you are human. However, it should please you to know that you share 50 - 60% of your DNA with a banana.
are you telling me that some people are 10% more banana than other people
God bless Adventure Time
SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY
Little Things (chill version) - One Direction
IM NOT EVEN KIDDING GUYS LISTEN TO IT MY FRIEND SHOWED IT TO ME AND I WAS JUST LIKE OMFG IT’S LIKE SO JAZZY AND IT MAKES ME FEEL GOOD AND I’VE NEVER HEARD IT ON THE INTERNET SO I’M ASSUMING YOU HAVEN’T TOO
I wanna have sex to this song
i need a download link omg
The Titanic theme played on the recorder.
here’s a picture of drool on my tablet from me laughing so hard
I AM ACTUALLY CRYING FROM LAUGHING
My grandma just came into my room and asked if i was ok she thought i was in pain or something but NO THATS NOT IT IM LAUGHING SO GODDAMN HAR DJESUS FUCKIFNG CRHISFT
MY DOG IS BARKING AT IT OMG
OMFG I WAS LISETING TO THIS I COULDN’T FEEL MY SIDES, THEN I SEEN THE PICTURE OF THE DROOL AND ROLLED OFF MY BED I CANT!!!
MY HALLMATES ARE TEXTING ME TO SHUT UP BECAUSE IT’S 2 AM AND THEY HAVE A FINAL TOMORROW BUT I CAN’T STOP HELP ME
Things were going so well, then I got smack in the face with a pile of “What the ever loving f***?!?!?”
So I’m re-reading Philosopher’s Stone and I finally notice something. The night Harry first finds the Mirror of Erised is Christmas night. Rowling wrote it so Harry gets to spend Christmas with his family.
My heart just broke
hey u kids wanna buy some drugs
Tree struck by lightning caused the bark to explode, effectively stripping the tree
nothing gets me hotter than a good old strip treese
r u kidding me